get ready. get set.

the new year is just 4 days away. and that's when i'm back on 100%.

i've been pretty good lately about my rules... not exactly following them, but more like considering before acting upon them.

overview for the year 2010, as i head into another year of slim down & beef up:

by reflecting on my pre-2010-post, here's what's changed, been accomplished, and yet to come.

in january, and into february, i had a consistent workout schedule. because of my schedule availability and the demand of tennis practices. in the summer i was diligent and hardworking, reaching a 5-mile run day, in pursuit of a 10k that never did happen. this fall i was good, tennis was a huge asset, and then it was fleeting, but still under control.

if we're talking numbers, i did amazingly. at the beginning of 2010, i weighed around 155, and today ... even after a bit of slacking ... i'm at a very happy 135. 20 pounds in a year wasn't easy, and sometimes it wasn't fun. but it was SO worth it. and i love everything about it.

spiritually - i didn't succeed in reading through the OT. i got through... i don't even remember anymore now, somewhere around judges, and through psalm and then quit. this fall i took 2 months to focus on 1 corinthians 13 and proverbs 31 and that was really good for me. it made me seriously consider each verse, each quality that expected of me and my inadequate attempt to be that person. it made me strive after those qualities and look for opportunities to grow and learn. really, really good for me. my journals from those 2 months are so refreshing.

i didn't really read the Bible that often with Shaner either. this will obviously be easier when we are married (in 5 months!!!!)... but still something we need to be disciplined about together. and as for cross-centered literature, i don't think i read 12. maybe not even 2. i read crazy love, which was SO good, and then...??... and then this fall i started a few books for a class, and continued reading one "soul survivor" for enjoyment, but have yet to finish it. i plan to continue this pursuit.

overall - it was an incredible year of growth. i am so happy to have kept track in some capacity of how everything evolved, and look forward to continuing it next year.

my goals for 2011:

i want to keep working on my "22 by 22" list.

i want to workout. a lot. (obviously i have a wedding coming, DUH.)

- running 5 times a week, pushing more for 7. (or any capacity of 30+ mins of cardio)

- strength training in my arms, abs, back, chest.

- yoga & stretching.

i want to eat right.

- one dessert per week.

- balanced fruit, veggies, etc.

- one day of vegetarian lifestyle per week.

(i'll talk about this on another post if i remember... if you care.)

- pop rarely.

i want to love God more.

i want to love other more.

i want to be a better me.

do you have goals for this new year? share them & i'd love to keep you accountable.

would you join me this year in making a slimmer, beefier you? let me know. small steps make a HUGE difference. try a little step and see how it helps. let me know about it.

thanks for reading, i always love the encouragement, accountability, and challenges.

God bless.

happy new year! :]

you thought i was gone.

so i was gone. for almost two months. i must say - i didn't try hard. i love this body, i love this lifestyle, but i had lost much inspiration to try hard to maintain or perfect it.

i've been caught back into my drive to really pursue this thing... this getting slimmer & beefier for me & for God thing.

step one: starting janurary 1st (oh, that dreaded january 1st) no sweets. none. zip, zilch. awful.

(but come on now people - i have a wedding.)

okay, maybe 1 sweet per week. much more do-able. and like-able. maybe i should start this sooner. how about december 1st?

step two: my journal. i've already been taking this step all novemeber long. i had another sort of february-type fast this month and took time away from facebook and sweets. (the sweets didn't last long)... but my journals, which capture my time with God and keep me accountable and focused, have become so sweet to me. i love to read back upon what's written, seeing God speak to me time and time again about His love, His grace, and what He's calling me to do act upon right now.

step three: with the move to chicago in january things are really going to change. my roommates will no longer be my roommates, but rather strangers who i suddenly share 500 (or less) square feet with. i won't have those tight bonds with my sisters in Christ, no more constant accountability, or someone i can share my heart with - good or bad. therefore, it's up to me to seek out a great church, a great friend that will keep me accountable. 100%.

step four: in chicago, i have to keep my energy up to workout and work at my health. i am not going to want to get up and run in the cold. i'm not going to want to come home and run in the cold. i'm not going to want to go out in the cold. period.

(anyone want to pay for my gym membership, $40/month for 4 months? i would truly, 100% appreciate it.)

and so, you probably guessed it, i will continue to blog into the new year: 2011... as many things in my life change: move to chicago, student teaching, MARRIAGE, new house, new life, new job... it is looking to be a crazy, beautiful year in the life of alyssa kaye. hope you'll join me. :)

wow. just, wow.

first off, an update to my 22 by 22 list...

1. read the Bible in its entirety

getting further and further behind. but God will give me power to keep on.
2. run 500 miles in one year

mileage: 112. but i haven't ran in over a week. :( (pulled hamstring)
3. go horseback riding

i could only dream at this point.
4. save $2500 for my future

you better believe it. i am almost half-way!!!
5. become a 4.5 tennis player

i'm going to have someone rate me during/at the end of this season. i'll find out. =)
6. collect all spare change for missions

this goal might be dropped. but i have picked up a missionary to support for $10/month, which isn't much, but more than i have done in the past!
7. cut down my closet/clothes

i sold some to plato's closet. AND i have given away more than 2 boxes to goodwill. i am down to the clothes that i will actually wear regularly. GREAT success.
8. go to a Ben Folds concert

not yet, but shane wants to hit one up around his birthday
9. read 20 new books

i think i had read 2 before this update, and i'm currenly reading harry potter 3, but i want to finish ALL of them by the time we get married next june. how i will do that during school and student teaching, i'm not sure...
10. find a new favorite band

done. the weepies. amazing. and perfect for my running style.
11. go to a Frontier Ruckus concert (or 5)

unfortunately not. and it's going to a be while until i do. but maybe they will take me up on the house-party offer i had last spring.
12. grow my hair to the middle of my back

it is well past shoulder length. =) and no cutting until thanksgiving. (unless my split ends get unruly.)
13. touch ground in 10 states

michigan, indiana, ohio, pennsylvania, new york, new jersey
14. feel confident in a swimsuit

this has potential to happen soon, except swimsuit season is practically over. doesn't mean i'm done working on my body though.

15. collect pieces from garage sales/flea markets and transform them for my future home

mirror, sconces - done.

16. continue taking piano lessons and perform for church

i took two from dukes this summer and already got significantly better. AND danielle and i have duet music for a christmas piece to play at church. =)
17. memorize a book of the Bible (longer than one chapter)

this has not happened one bit yet. i think that a chapter is good way to start for now. =/
18. memorize that same book of the Bible in Spanish

likewise.
19. ride a new rollercoaster with my hands up for every moment

DONE. =)
20. teach JJ (my niece) how to play tennis

haven't started yet. need to sooooon.
21. teach JJ how to speak 20 meaningful sentences/phrases in Spanish

ive taught her: "dejame en paz" and "hazme azmuerzo" (leave me alone & make me lunch!) =)
22. plan my perfect wedding

my dress - done, photographer - done, girls' dresses - almost, reception look - done, this is all in very good progress.

in other news - tomorrow (today, really) i start pre-season with my tennis girls. it's my last tennis season, my last semester at school, so many lasts that i'm NOT ready for one bit. i'm the type of person that LOVES college - absolutely everything about it. sure, i look forward to the summers - but i am always ready to go back. i love class, i love playing a sport, and i LOVE living with my best friends. PLUS - it's not the real world. i don't have financial issues, i don't deal with job loss, i don't have to worry - because i'm surrounded by goodness and life seems beautiful.

i'm very excited about this tennis season, as i have mentioned in past posts. i'm excited to see what God can do through me as a servant and minister on the team. i'm excited about the new girls and the new chemistry our team is going to have. and how excited the other girls on the team are and how we can feed off each other to really make this year different, to make it great. tomorrow's the day that i present my "lessons from montana trip" to the team and really talk about my objectives for this season and the commitments that i have and want them to have for the team. i'm not ready at all to present this. and it's well, 12:30 am. and i have a million and a half other things to do before that. i need to pray about that meeting, and really have God give me the words and inspiration to help us all to have united spirits and committed minds for this team, for this season.

okay - that paragraph was not at all what you wanted to read. sorry - i just needed to type it out, it helps me.

so i packed up my room these last few days. everything. tomorrow, when i fill up my car (and i mean REALLY full) i will have 95% of my belongings with me, 0% in my room at home, and about 5% in my closet, stacking in neat piles of boxes, crates, and madness (which are mostly teaching supplies and textbooks for my future classroom.) it's so weird to really think that this is the beginning to the rest of my life. i know that everyday is the beginning really, but seriously - this is how shane and i look at it:

today - move to college for preseason.

beginning of september - start 1st semester...thanksgiving break...end of semester.

1 month at home: substitute teaching/working at target.

january 17th: move to chicago for student teaching.

may 6th: finish student teaching.

may: home to substitute teaching, final wedding plans, etc.

june 3: get married and start my life in the real world. (after the honeymoon of course. =))

it's crazy to thing that just 9 months from now i will be married, living in chicago, with the MAN OF MY DREAMS and just being. being together. together. =) boy, does that make me happy.

and with that note - i will blissfully fall asleep, and wake up, teach my last week of sunday school, pack the rest of my car, drive to school, see my fiance, and move into my apartment.

God, You are good. so good. help me to see it and live it at ALL times.

i missed the 1st.

i missed my "august 1st" post yesterday, so here it is.

first of all - my challenge to you (my readers, followers, or guests). my current mileage is... 94 (i think. i don't have the piece of paper right in front of me because i'm not at home, but it is VERY close to that number, if it is not exact.) i challenge you all out there, to beat me in my next 100 miles. who can beat me to 200?

to give you an idea of how fast i will get there - i have been working on my first 100 miles since april 15th. i missed many days, but still managed to get to where i'm at in 3 1/2 months. i am behind schedule to reach 500 in a year however, so i plan to pick up my pace (as i have since my june post, you may have noticed.) also, i do run more miles that i used to, averaging over 2 per day. BUT - do not be discouraged.

here's why. #1: i am about to enter my pre-season/season very soon. 3 weeks to be exact. let's just supposed that i'm not going to want to play tennis for 6-8 hours a day and then go run too much. #2: your rules are a little different. you can run AND/OR walk. now you don't have an excuse. who can turn down a competitive challenge to walk more miles than i run? it's a win/win situation. you'll be getting exercise, probably shedding pounds/inches, AND you'll probably beat me to it.

so, who's in? comment on here (or on the post via facebook) and let me know if you are up to the challenge. at least give it a shot, please. i need some friendly competition to push me on. if you take me on, i will keep in weekly (if not daily) contact with you to let you know how i'm progressing as well to keep you accountable and know how you are doing. please leave me a way to easily and frequently contact you. let's get the race on. :)

in OTHER news... nahh, i think i'll save the rest for another post. coming soon. (NOT in a month... at least i hope.)

EDIT: you probably want more incentive, right? i forgot to mention the prize. if you beat me in the next 100 miles, i will buy you a $15 gift card for the store or restaurant of your choice. (i would prefer to buy you a target gift card, because it would be boosting sales, but i'll leave that to you.) :)

july is almost a goner.

you have been waiting, and here it is. my (only) july post.

i can't believe that i haven't updated since the day shaner got back from china. i really can't believe he's only been back for a month. it has been a GREAT month. i work around 20 hours a week at target in battle creek, teach tennis 3-4 days a week for 3-6 hours each day, and spend my extra time traveling, with my parents, and with shane. i LOVE summer.

tennis has been really good - i've learned SO much about coaching and teaching tennis and i genuinely think that i could not only coach a tennis team (which i did last spring), but teach lessons, and run a summer clinic. this could be some GREAT side income (and joy, since i love the sport.) i'm ready for season to start up, but nervous because this fall is the last time i will be playing competitively until i'm rich enough to join a women's league sometime in my future.

in june, shane came home and we spent time together as much as we could before he had to start his job (on campus at springarbor). i headed right off the montana for a week and it was incredible. i learned so much about how to lead my team this fall and was challenged in every way. i got completely excited about tennis this fall and the difference that i believe i can make on the team. i'm excited to see how God is going to use me in that way.

i also met the most wonderful people on that trip. it is such a weird dynamic to travel with 30 people who are all very athletic and social - something that most people don't experience. it really set in when we were playing kickball (on the side of a BEAUTIFUL mountiain) and i realized - how often is it that this many people are together playing a competitive, yet relaxed, game and everyone is truly enjoying themselves. too often that many people cause for too many personalities and someone isn't having a good time, isn't with the group, or wishes they were doing something else. those other athletes and i have a special relationship after that week that i can't explain, but am truly excited to see this fall back on campus.

after montana i was back to work for a few weeks, then i went to pennsylvania with my whole family to a house in the poconos. it was wonderful to get away for week and reconnect with my family (especially my brother and sister, Brent and Keyla, since i don't get to see them nearly enough). i felt lucky and blessed to have my family to myself for a whole week and just enjoy each other's company. :) we went shopping, golfing, puttputting, to the amusement park, whitewater rafting (floating really), played cards, and much more. it was amazing and i can't wait to do it again.

on the way back (sort of) i met up with the allens (my new family) on their way to new york city. i completely surprised shane with my sneaky arrival to provide him with the best week ever. :) we went to two broadway shoes: up in the heights and promises, promises. both were wonderful. we went shopping... a LOT. (my credit card statement proves that to be true.) and we just enjoyed the city and each other. (PS - i REALLY like my families. and simply spending time with them.) shane and i went on an adventure one day and found a donut shop and ice cream truck that we had read about in sky magazine. (you know - the magazine on the seat back in airplanes?) that was an adventure and we stumbled upon a cute little spot in nyc called union square with the best used-book store ever. i must return. you all must.

since then, i've been back to work and teaching tennis. i started a little more wedding planning and i am getting really excited about it the more the ideas and conversations flow. (which is a definite change from my recent dread.)

i've been reading a little (but am going to really try to do it more) - half way through harry potter #3 right now. and i want to finish the series by our wedding day. (315ish days :).)

i've been running, kind of a lot. my mileage: 87. by the end of july (in 3 days) i want to get to the 100 mark, then i'll be posting a challenge for my readers on august 1st. (remind me on facebook if you don't see it up.) get excited.

i think that's all for now. i really have been slacking on reading my Bible (which is awful because i was doing so well before shane got back and have been doing so horribly since.) please be on me about that. (especially if you see me on facebook - a quick reminder will be welcomed. :).)

thanks so much for reading. and loving me. and supporting me. 2010 is a GREAT year so far. it's flying, but it's wonderful. i'm healthier and so so happy.

junebug.

whoops, the time has passed me again. i hadn't realized that it had been since may since i had last posted.

well, here's the newest update: i'm sticking to the rules. (isn't that WEIRD?!) i've been running a ton lately, trying to run a few miles everyday. i feel lost without it almost. which is great. i was sick the last few days... still have a stuffy nose and head, so running wasn't an option dealing with the flu. but this morning, i got back out there and ran 3.5. felt... amazing. well actually, i didn't get 4 because i was struggling with a side cramp, but it felt amazing to be running again and to run further than my normal 2 miles. oh - and this puts me in the 40's for mileage for my "22 by 22" goals.

my weight, you might ask. (i don't know if anyone actually cares, but i feel like it's a big deal and the only way i can really measure my progress.) 139. blissfully. it feels amazing to be under 140. i don't think i remember the last time i was. i'm working hard, i'm not being harmful to myself, and i'm earning my reward. it's wonderful.

just last week i said to my mom, "do you know what these things are?" (pointing to my sides) for the first time... maybe EVER, i have a curve in my side. my middle is not a straight line from my shoulders to my hips, there's a curve. it's amazing. they're great. and i've earned them. :)

today, i happen to be wearing dress that shows off those nearly earned and arrived curves... for a special celebration - shane's arrival! :) he gets back into detroit in just 2 hours... and man, am i anxious.

summer has been good so far. other than the fact that shane's been in china for 22 days. i've been working almost everyday for a few hours, sleeping in, running, wathcing csi & friends, and spending too much time on facebook. next week i'm off to montana for a leadership conference. i'm excited to spend some time in the mountains (my favorite, if you didn't know). also excited to meet new people - the trip is for next year's team captains for spring arbor. i don't really know anyone well, so i'm excited to see what's in store.

when i get back, i'll continue working at target, start teaching tennis with my high school coach, and spending way too much money on gas driving to jackson to see shaner. (he's working full-time at school this summer.)

that's all for now. leave me encouragement, question, statement, concern, comment, anything really. thanks for reading.

the progress.

remember this list?

22 things I want to do by the time I'm 22:

1. read the Bible in its entirety
2. run 500 miles in one year
3. go horseback riding
4. save $2500 for my future
5. become a 4.5 tennis player
6. collect all spare change for missions
7. cut down my closet/clothes
8. go to a Ben Folds concert
9. read 20 new books
10. find a new favorite band
11. go to a Frontier Ruckus concert (or 5)
12. grow my hair to the middle of my back
13. touch ground in 10 states
14. feel confident in a swimsuit

here's the rest:

15. collect pieces from garage sales/flea markets and transform them for my future home
16. continue taking piano lessons and perform for church
17. memorize a book of the Bible (longer than one chapter)
18. memorize that same book of the Bible in Spanish
19. ride a new rollercoaster with my hands up for every moment
20. teach JJ (my niece) how to play tennis
21. teach JJ how to speak 20 meaningful sentences/phrases in Spanish
22. plan my perfect wedding

the progress thus far:

1. i'm in 2nd samuel & done with psalm
2. i'm done with 23 miles, and quickly reclaiming my mileage. (so far behind)
3. i thought about it - does that count?
4. slowly, but surely it's gaining. i'll let you know when i hit $1000. (should be soon this summer.)
5. i'm teaching tennis this summer, looking for opportunities to play, and might join a women's league
6. i had forgotten about this one, which is weird since i did it last year.
7. a HUGE basket is waiting and ready to go to goodwill. :] (probably time to go shopping now, right?!)
8. i don't know when i will see Ben next.
9. 1 book down: The Borrowers
10. i'm working on this: i downloaded 50 or so new artists last weekend. the weepies aren't really new to me, but i do newly love them. i don't think this counts.
11. i recently gave up a chance to go see fruckus, but soon. but soon.
12. it's PAST my shoulders. and the more i don't do it, the longer it seems the next time.
13. still have only touched michigan. soon to change: montana & pennsylvania trips.
14. i'm getting more confident, still lack that complete security though.

15. i've found a dresser on craig's list for $20 that with a little touch-up paint turned into a BEAUT and i found a completely ugly gold mirror at a garage sale for $5 (that came with some sconces i haven't touched yet) and i painted it red - it's gorgeous now.
16. dukes (my aunt) is giving me lessons this summer and i will continue them in the fall. and danielle has agreed to play a duet with me in church.
17. i haven't started thinking, but i will soon.
18. same.
19. going to two parks in the next week. perfect opportunity.
20. spending some time with her this week, we'll make progress.
21. same.
22. dress: check. photographer: check. bridesmaids' dresses: almost. flowers: started.

doing well.

sunday, monday, tuesday, yesterday (friday), and today (saturday) i ran. success.

thursday, yesterday, & today i ate healthy. success.

this new motivation (whatever it was) sure worked for me.

last night i went running just over 2 miles. came back, took a shower, then did an ab workout that got me sweaty again. :]

this morning i went running 2.5 miles, joined up with dukes (my aunt) and went walking for 2 miles. little did i know we were speed walking and she wanted to "try" running too. let's just say that little hour-long workout kicked my butt... in a great way.

favorite healthy snack lately: plain flavored rice cake (35 calories) with all-natural peanut butter (90 calories) with a little cinnamon&sugar (too few calories to count) on top or last night, i tried 1/4 of a banana (30 calories). delicious, nutritious, and some protein to go: 155 calories. yes please. :]

today's menu:

breakfast: go-lean crunch with yogurt, banana

lunch: chicken salad, corn on the cob, strawberry jello

dinner: who knows, maybe taco bell? i deserve it i think.

let me know how you're doing, little steps make a HUGE difference.

i'll have a big challenge for you all coming up next month sometime. remind me if i forget.

he's gone.

i know this post is not on topic with the theme of my blog, but for my sake, i need to write it out.

today is wednesday... and thankfully it's almost over. only 3 more wednesdays until shaner is back in the US and back in my arms. he left today for china. i know - you are all saying: "but alyssa, you leave every summer for 3 months, this is only 3 weeks." but the thing is - i left when i left. i was the busy, distracted one. i was the one who sometimes (sorry) forgot about home for a second. and now i'm the one at home, anticipating with everything in me the arrival, and he just left a few hours ago.

what may be worse is our lack of ability to communicate. he is only promised one opportunity to have access to internet while he's gone. we are used to talking everyday about everything. i don't know what to do now when all i want to do is turn my head and tell him everything. when i want to pick up my phone and know he's going to answer. when i want to be able to reach out and hold his hand.

i know i'm being dramatic. that's what girls do. especially girls in love. i'm sorry. i will get better. but right now, i just want him home. for good. (and in reality God, i just want him safe, happy, and coming home soon.)

breakfast with my Maker.

so i just read some of my posts from january and re-encouraged myself. this brought about 2 goals for myself to activate right now: 1) record my diet/foot eaten to remind myself that snacks & desserts do matter and that i do know how to eat healthily 2) read my Bible during the day. i've been putting it off until i go to bed, which is perfectly fine, i'm still incredibly consistent (for me at least) and loving reading, but i have just now remembered the greatness of eating lunch or breakfast with God. in john 21:12, Jesus says "come and eat breakfast." that's what i'm going to do RIGHT now, eat breakfast with my Maker. (then go for a run.)

so all of that was a big, fat lie.

i haven't re-started the rules. uggg. i hate my unmotivation. i want to be crazy fitness like i was in january. i'm starting to try again at least. yesterday and today i ran. that was nice.

i bought a yoga ball today, although it is for women that are taller than 6'3". whoops. i'll return it this afternoon and get a new one. terri (my future-mother-in-law) is going to show me all the tricks to do on it. she might also hand me down some extra weights so that i don't have to splurge on the weight set i want. the one i want is from target, it's $70 when it's not on sale, and it hasn't been on sale since just after christmas. but if i collect enough pairs of weights from other people, then i can just buy the sizes i'm missing. (although i would LOVE to have that set from target because it's soooo nice.)

after today, TODAY, i'm back on the rules. well starting right now really. i ate cheesecake a few hours ago, but it was good enough to call my last dessert for a while.

shane leaves on wednesday for china for 3 weeks, and while he's gone it's my goal to get back to 140. i'm around 146 right now, because i lost all my muscle weight and have been eating whatever the heck i want. so that's my goal, 3 weeks about being serious.

any encouragement? anyone in?

mileage: 13. (a LOT behind for my 500 goal)

bible point: starting 2 samuel & done with psalm

may day

it's MAY. can you believe it? i'm not sure that i know if april ever showed up, let alone 30 days of it passed. good news about may: school is just two weeks from ending AND alyssa is back on the rules... the diet rules... the tough ones... the ones i'm hesitant to follow, but i know are good for me.

here's a repeat of those big guys: no eating after 9pm (this is earlier than before, but late enough for me to function on my busy schedule), no pop (it's been bad lately, i love me some shirley temples), 1 sweet per week (also lower than before, but i really want this), breaking rules only 2 times per month.

also, since tennis is over (for a few weeks now), my workout schedule is a little different... but i also have a crazy, busy schedule (per usual) for the next few weeks:

monday/wednesday/friday: 30 minutes of lifting, 30 minutes cardio

(p.s. - i haven't lifted since march, whoops.)

tuesday/thursday/saturday: minimum 40 minutes cardio.

in self magazine (my latest obsession since 2010), they have been talking a lot about making sure that you get enough workout time in each "sizzle zone" per week - here's the breakdown: 65 minutes of zone 1 (easy breezy training: casual/brisk walking, your-type of tennis, etc.), 80 minutes of zone 2 (moderate training: when you're working so hard you can only speak short sentences/i.e. running, my-type of tennis), and 65 minutes of zone 3 (hard working, killing it, out of control fast). i think during my workouts, i'm going to start trying for these zones to really burn off the fat.

as for some of my 22 by 22 goals: i'm already in 1 samuel & almost done with psalms (YAY, i think i am aloud to be really proud of myself on this one, i've never been so consistent with my Bible reading), my saving account is over $300 (another HUGE step for me - i'm telling you, 2010 is a good year to be alyssa eubank, i am changing in so many ways), my tennis game is already improving since season. i ended the season with a huge 3-set win, which was great for my confidence and ability to keep my position on the team. since then, i've found out that a heavier racket was the key to rule my game, so i'm in the process of buying two rackets that are a lot better for me as a player... 4.5 tennis player, here i come. i was supposed to be at a frontier ruckus concert right now, but that didn't happen. i still need all 5 before next april, i don't think that will be a problem. :] lastly - as for the 500 miles, i'm 10 in. i know, i know - that's not keeping up to pare with the average "just less than 2 per day", but i am really happy with this: on tuesday last week - i ran 4 miles straight. i never knew that i could do this, that i'm a runner. i just wanted to set out and do it, so i ran 2 miles away from my apartment so i'd have no excuse but to run the 2 miles back. and i did it! and i could have kept running! (my ankles were killing because i have REALLY old running shoes with a few too many miles on them.) but my legs, lungs, and heart wanted to keep on running and really find out just how much they could do. it felt... GREAT.

so that's all for now. i've already ate my 1 sweet for this week, since well, i forgot it was may. whoops. here's to a month of rules, of following them, and of really seeing results. keep me accountable, and please keep me encouraged. thanks for reading! :]

catch.

there's lots to say about the last few weeks and not much good news.

after easter/holiday celebration/a lot of chocolate & desserts - my diet was over. i took a two (or three) week break. it was bad. i ate whatever, whenever, with a who-cares attitude. i'm sure that i gained all the weight back, and i don't want to get on the scale to prove it. i would much rather just move forward.

so starting monday (because this weekend is still continuation of celebrating my birthday - aka atleast 2 more cakes), i will be back to a steady, strict plan to get back down and healthy. this is an even bigger push because tennis ends today, so whatever calories that practices/matches are burning are out of the picture. it's back to the gym. all day, everyday. (just kidding about that last part.) but seriously - i will have to make my own cardio lessons rather than relying on practice to get it me.

so, i think the next step would be to publish a list i've been working on. (did you hear that ashley - i'm following you are your lists?) kevin (my future/i-like-to-think-current father-in-law) was the influence for this list, and it is something i would like to continue to do throughout my life.

22 things I want to do by the time I'm 22:

1. read the Bible in its entirety
2. run 500 miles in one year
3. go horseback riding
4. save $2500 for my future
5. become a 4.5 tennis player
6. collect all spare change for missions
7. cut down my closet/clothes
8. go to a Ben Folds concert
9. read 20 new books
10. find a new favorite band
11. go to a Frontier Ruckus concert (or 5)
12. grow my hair to the middle of my back
13. touch ground in 10 states
14. feel confident in a swimsuit
15.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20.
21.
22.

i'm still short a few goals. any suggestions? i will come back to this list in the next few days and work on finishing it up so i can see my next year laid out for me. i like that i dreamt big on a few points, but it also makes it difficult to up-the-anty next year when i plan my 23-list.

so i've made headway already on this list - #1, i'm already all the way done with joshua on my first time through the whole Bible. i will continue at the end of this year (walking through the Old Testament) and read the NT. #2 - i'm 2 miles down and about to be 4 miles in. this goal is averaged at less than 2 miles per day, which i think will be a challenge to keep getting up and running and a great work-ethic for me to develop. #4 - i currently have almost $300 in savings. stop laughing - i know it's not much. but it's a HUGE amount for me to have set away. and remember back - i've been saving $10/week, so at the end of this year from that alone i will have $520. i'm already ahead of schedule. :] #5 - this refers to a USTA tennis ranking. by playing in a collegiate program, i'm already assumed to be a 4.5 (out of 7.0) ability, but this is not true. i want to change this. i want to really up my game this summer and next fall. #6 - this is a goal i set last year for myself. after being away for the summer, and collecting for probably close to 10 months, i had $25 of change that was donated to a mission trip from one of the trips from spring arbor. i liked this and want to do it again.#9 - hopefully in the next week this will be well started, since i have at least 5 more books to read by thursday for a class project. whoops.

so that's the report for now. i'm headed off to run a few laps for relay for life. this is for YOU: tommy & grandpa. i love you both. this is for YOU caleb - you will fight through.

final countdown.

today's april 2nd. 2 days past my final weigh-in. i forgot on the 31st, but yesterday i took the step, onto the scale, to find out what has become of me these last 3 months. before i stepped on though, i thought to myself - even if this number isn't exactly what i dreamed of, i love my body and my new lifestyle. yes, as a woman, i will always want to be smaller, slimmer, toner. but i know, whether or not i have just come to this realization through my latest obsession with fitness and health, that i was created beautiful, exactly how God wanted.

and so, here it is - my goal on january 1st was to lose 13 pounds: from 153 to 140. i aimed at 1 pound per week, but the reality was that i lost 10 pounds - ending at 143, which is the lowest i've weighed since i went from girls' clothing to juniors'. (by the way - i'm pretty sure i shot straight from a size 3 jean to 8 in one day a couple years back.) speaking of which - i am now a size 6, and love it.

so my lifestyle change has altered my exercise habits, eating habits, and the attitude i have about myself and hard-work. i know that living healthy isn't always the easiest choice, nor the cheapest, but i do like the sacrifices of time and money that i make to be bettering myself for the future.

and so... here's the rest of 2010's goal. i've worked hard thus far, in the last 3 months, and am ready to continue. i now have about 38 weeks left of the year, and my new goal is to lose 10-13 more pounds and end the year at 130. i know this is a LOT of weight to lose in a year, when i was not near obese to start off, but i also know that weighing 130 won't be a selfish goal, nor unhealthy. i will be fit.

i will continue to post about my changes (spiritual and physical) and i hope that you will join me in my continuation. thanks for all the support and encouragement. please keep it up!

celebrating.

like i said, i am celebrating my grocery shopping experience! :] i'm so pleased and happy to have groceries again (finally). tonight, after babysitting, shane and i went to kroger to do some only-people-in-the-store-shopping, which was completely productive and i left with a LOT of healthy choices. ooh, how it feels so good. i forgot what it was like to have full, healthy, filling cupboards.

gosh - i sound like a mom, who has no life. nope - just 20 year-old me. :] so here's the list of the wonderful goods (at least the best of the best): eggs, milk, bread, yogurt, salad, green pepper, cucumber, pears, strawberries, blueberries, tomatoes, lunch meat, cheese, sour cream, kettle chips & dip, rice chips, organic fruit sticks, protein bars, rice cakes, pancake mix (a must for my roommates and myself), juices, and much more. it was a very successful, happy night. haha, i'm a freak.

in other news - here's some randomness for you: two thoughts/ponders in the last 24 hours that i thought i would share. #1 - reading in deuteronomy last night and there's a passage about tithing, the first direct how-to tithe directions that i've read this year. here's the thing - it's all about eating your tithes in God's presences. i know these are food sacrifices, but even if you brought animals for sacrifice, you were supposed to sell them to get money to buy food to eat in the temple. i mean - i get muffins each sunday when i'm home, but maybe i should be getting 10% of what i make in muffins to really be tithing. what are your thoughts on this? i'm just throwing this out there, i know it can't be right. #2 - sitting on the toilet this morning, i realized how cool God is. i know - great place to think. but seriously - i was taking a little poo and thinking about how cool it is that our bodies are made in such a way that we need food to sustain life. not only that, but God has designed us for our bodies to just function, no questions asked, no thought given. i know i'm 20 years old and this is an easy concept for everyone. i'm not just discovering this, but i just like to think about the simply, crazy complex things God has done that we have taken for granted. here's what i'm saying - just next time you go number two, think to yourself, 'didn't my body just do that all by itself? naturally?' God is working in EVERY moment. sorry to bring in such an offensive one for my example. i just love Him.

down hill?

although i started to work out & lift again this week after spring break, i feel like i'm headed downhill. i can't seem to stay motivated on the eating front: i let myself get some desserts here and there, and seemingly everywhere. now, i know that eating desserts is not bad for me, but i need to get more strict. i need to re-motivate myself. back to page one.

i'm not going to make the weigh-in, although i am completely happy with my results. i'm still going to wait to reveal all of that until march 31. that's the day. i hope you're anticipating it, because i truly am: 6 days until it's here. whoops, now 5 - just turned midnight.

i'm also out of healthy groceries, since i've been putting off grocery shopping until april. i think i'm going to head out this weekend so i can keep myself sane. no milk, no yogurt, no vegetables, no fruits, hardly any bread, no eggs. oh man, i'm making myself crazy. having no healthy replacement snacks makes resisting temptation that much harder. i need to restock.

the Bible reading is still going most excellent - i'm in deuteronomy right now and i love reading the promises that God has made to/for us: His faithfulness, His protection, His provision. He is good! Amen?

lifting has been really good lately - i feel my muscles again. they definitely liked the break and got too much of it so that now they forget how to lift without soreness. feels good to get back into the gym and really push myself in that aspect. i need to probably spend more time out running, but tennis, class, and work has got me pretty well busy and stressed lately.

i guess that's all for tonight. i'll probably go grocery shopping this weekend and then need to celebrate (aka a blog post) and then soon enough you'll hear the real benefits and results of this 3 month test i took. can i just say it? i'm proud of myself. i'm proud of the lifestyle change i've made, the commitment and progress i've done. it's cool. and i'm happy. i'm proud. that's all.

the breakdown of the past 2 weeks and next 2 weeks.

two weeks later. i know, i know - i'm guilty. and sorry. and to make it worse - it hasn't been a good/productive past two weeks either.

bible reading is still going amazingly. i'm just finishing up numbers in the next few days and in the 80's of psalms. i am truly loving the reading as well. (minus the repetitive sacrifice descriptions.) this week (maybe today) i'm going to start reading "come thirsty" with is my march book for my one-christian-book-per-month-goal. i'm excited to open that up and find a deeper thirst for God.

eating habits last week were bad. i was fine with the portions and everything - but sweets were on overload. i didn't even stop myself. when i saw something delicious - i ate it. good thing is - only gained a pound, so i know where to start again. i'm not losing it completely. this week is extremely busy for traveling and activities, so i'm not sure how well i will do with dieting or exercising. plus i'm fighting a cold, which today feels better, so i'm trying to wait until that one leaves before i go out running again.

speaking of running though - i did run outside twice last week, which i haven't done since february almost. i love it. i miss it. i'm looking forward to building my mileage back up again. please keep me accountable on this, especially as i am completely isolated and independent this summer at home.

my goal for the next few weeks (my weigh-in deadline for 140 pounds is in 16 days!!!) is to limit carbs to what i need only for practice and matches/working out. no sweets starting TODAY (that'll be interesting to see). and really push myself to workout, especially this week that i'm all over the place and away from a gym. i'm not going to reveal my weight today because i'm so close to my weigh-in day, but keep encouraging me for this last stretch to 140.

thanks so much for reading and leaving encouragement/comments. just to let you know - i have fallen in love with my lifestyle these last 3 months, so i'm not going to be done in the slightest at the end of march. therefore, i'll still keep blogging into my continuation, as long as you all still read. :] let me know if my posting is not desired.

and last of all, and best of all: last friday, my handsome, incredible, perfect boyfriend asked me to marry him - so i'm ENGAGED to be married to shane patrick allen. and i'm as happy as i can be. so excited. so anxious. and incredibly blessed. :]

welcome back world.

february.

february was fast, freeing, and full. i never had one dull moment, not even a second to relax. it was full of deadlines, appointments, and commitments. this kept my fast from being all that it could have been, but it's the history now. i fully appreciate the time i set aside last month to simply BE with God. i loved sacrificing for His glory. He deserves everything and nothing should stop me from being committed with word and deed (time) -- including facebook or even food.

i didn't journal a ton during the month, so i don't have too much to share. here's what i do have though:

day1: chapel was good, and i was ready to hear God. (side note: sacrificing for God's sake allows you to be more open and ready for what He has in store or is saying. it was a blessing this past month.) Tim Delina talked about having an open mouth for the glory of God. our body is a vessel for the ministry of spreading the Gospel, so every time we choose to close our mouths or hold back what God is saying through us, we are diminishing His purpose and plan. our mouths were created for two things: His PRAISE and spreading the Gospel. i want to do both... continuously.

he also spoke about doing things that need God to show up for, calling on a miracle. when we live with this kind of faith - we are truly 100% trusting in God to come through, to be our support. the book i read last month (crazy love) also spoke on this need for living dangerously for God's glory. i like it. i want it. i think it goes along with my verse for the year - being recklessly in love with God enough that it doesn't make sense to the people around me nor will the world understand. (the LUKE passage)

(side note: my book for this month was called 'Fasting' by Jentezen Franklin. it was really inspiring and challenging as i started and finished my first fast. i definitely recommend it.)

day2: i found myself frustrated with the new fast, where i wasn't doing facebook, tv, extra stuff - yet still my God-time was when i hit my bed for the night. it was something i struggled with the whole month, but God is still using those moments to speak to me. He's so cool.

day3: chapel, again - GOOD. from the lion, witch, and the wardrobe: Aslan is not safe, but He is GOOD. God is good. He's NOT safe. and that's okay with me. i love thinking about God's risky business and how He's bringing me into it.

day7: church at CBC (back home), Brent Wood spoke about dealing with disappointments. although at that moment, and even now i'm not dealing with hard disappointment - i have in the past, i will in the future, and sometimes life even now - as little as things are - get me down. the aspect i loved from this message was: making God's glory more important that my own personal desires. John 11.24 in the death of Lazarus, Jesus said that God will get glory from even this. he will be honored and glorified when i am more worried about that rather than being gratified.

day10: chapel again - not so crazy about it. but this one line stuck with me: people are not persuaded to the Gospel, they are attracted to it. what am i doing to attract people to the Gospel? when we live as the world does, or just a "little cleaner" - are they seeing the difference, are they seeing the impact of Christ?

day11: i made a conscious effort to be a patient and joyful person for the next week. i had/have been struggling with happiness... which is weird, i know. i don't smile. i don't laugh. i sit, and sulk, and dread. but i KNOW God's peace and i KNOW the joy He has given. i am ready to be on fire spiritually and emotionally to be a light, a joyful light to those around. this is still a struggle, but i like it. i like to challenge God has given to me to work to see His good in my bad.

day15: God loves us not because we are good, but in order to make us good. i like this too. :]

day18: submission. asking for God's guidance in something He might have in store. i'm not ready to talk about this yet on here, but just be praying for me as i'm pursuing what God has in store.

day22: chapel again. "Lord, teach us to pray." Luke 11.1. & our problem with submission: we want Him to be our Savior, but we're uncomfortable with Him being our LORD.

day22 (again): Psalm 63.1,5 "my soul thirsts for You; my whole body longs for You...You satisfy me more than the richest feast."

it was... good. amazing. thank You God for february. and meeting me there.

in other news? workouts are continued. i took a dieting break last week, which might have been bad. but i'm back on track now. i weigh 144 and have only 4 more pounds to make my end of march mark. i'm excited. my diet (starting today) is back to its strictness. also - i'm going to try to not eat after 8pm from here on out because it's healthy to have a 12-hour fast every night. my goal is no eating from 8pm until 8am. my body can burn that much more during those hours.

it's now that i really wish i would have taken pre-2010 workout pictures. it would be that much more inspiring to me. i mean - swimsuit season is coming up and that's one reason for me to get fit, and i love the way i look and feel - so there's two reasons. but seeing the difference between 2 months ago and now - i can only imagine how much more motivational it would be.

i'm happy. i love 2010. i love the changes and molding that has been taking place. i love growing deeper with my relationship with God. i love being healthy with my body (eating and working out). i love the blessings that i have experienced in the last 2 months. God is good.

it's going to get a lot beefier.

we've been talking about being leaner and slimmer for a while now, but let's discuss the beefing up aspect. in two ways:

number one: i have arm muscles for the first time... in my life. i know - i'm lame. i have legs that could lift a car and NO upper body strength, that is - until now. my little baby muscles beef up out of my arms like little mountains... or just hills, and not the steep sledding-type hills.

number two: spiritually beefing up is about to get a lot more serious. bridgett and pat's church does a february fast. i've never fasted before, so this'll be interesting. here's the plan:

all month: no sweets, no tv, no internet, no computer, no books, no music. EXCEPT: the Bible and Jesus music.

(obviously i'll be on my computer for homework and reading my textbooks - but other than homework this'll be all out Jesus month.)

week one: follow the rules above.

week two: all rules and add no meat.

week three: all rules and add no solid foot.

week four: all rules and only water.

i'm sure that i'll do weeks 1-3 rule for rule, but week four - i'm going to attempt for 2 days and see how i do and then go back to week three's rules.

this means no blogging during february. don't worry, i'll be journaling like a mad woman, so i'll have a lot to say when i get back. i'm excite for this month and look forward to some incredible growth through it.

3.5 down, 5 less.

yesterday was the day - when i let it slip through my fingers.

i ... didn't work out. i ... ate some crap.

but i'm moving on, and i'm making it right. i'm going to keep going.

good news: i'm down to the 147-149 pounds area.

3.5 weeks in and i've lost about 5 pounds.

and i feel SO much healthier.

i love the way i feel, not so sure about the way i look.

soon though - my body outside will be transformed as well.

sorry this is so short, but i just wanted to update you quickly.

the emotional high from this excitement is starting to wear off.

i wake up and DON'T want to run. (mostly because it's freezing outside)

but once i work out, i feel incredible.

and so - i will press on. i will keep going.

tomorrow morning - 8am workout with my roommates. :]

bridgett size.

someday i hope to accomplish my blog title. or maybe a little bigger.

brent got on me today abut blogging, so since i've finished tomorrow's homework early, i thought i would write before i go to bed real soon.

yesterday morning (wednesday) i had a quiz to study for, so i went to the workout room and studied my notecards while stair-stepping/elliptical-ing. the machine didn't know what it was and neither did i. then i lifted and it felt good to lift after a few days off. for my birthday i'm going to ask for some weights so that i can workout on the weekends and when a weightroom isn't as accessible.

this morning i woke up early and went for a 2 mile run or so. i hated it at first, but finished anyway. then i came back to the room and ate breakfast while reading my bible. after breakfast i went to the gym to play tennis for an hour with becca and suz.

hitting was so good today - i've missed tennis (even though i played a week ago) and really can't wait to get back to the top of my game and just go after matches with everything. i have a new outlook for this season/the next. i'm going to go into each match abandoned for all that can happen, playing my hardest every point because i have nothing to lose. i'm a senior - i want to say that i worked my hardest, played my best, and gave my all. so hopefully i can remember that as i go into all the matches and practice. i want to hit everyday with all that i am, reckless of an injury or whatever else may keep me back. i want to play with my heart.

about a week ago i missed reading my Bible on a few days, but got caught up within the next few days. another first probably - 3 weeks of reading my Bible everyday, and LOVING it. i love reading these stories out of genesis that i have never read on my own and lately, just spending my breakfast in God's presence - starting my day out right.

and i am happy. so happy. my life is blessed.

weekend bliss.

this past weekend was so great. i've already talked about my visit with karen & ashley/jason's family. sunday my family and i went to bethel college area to visit mina/scott's famly, donna & michelle, and danielle. (and serena - in case she wants to be mentioned as well.) well - let's just say so much time "on the road" or even at my parents home helps me to slip out of my health food junkie-ness. sunday we have 5 guys & fries, which was delicious and would have been okay by itself. then on the way home we stopped for ice cream and i asked and received the "babiest" ice cream cone they could make... still decently okay (although a 3rd dessert for the week). then for dinner we had popcorn (still doing alright). but then shane and i got restless at home, so we headed out. (on a sunday night - what is there to do?)

we went out to kohl's, which closed within the half hour, and then were at a loss of what to do. so we decided to go for 1/2-off appetizers at applebee's. they were delicious, but not needed; especially on top of all the other junk i ate. oh how my stomach hurt... and even more in the morning, which leads me to my next point.

working out yesterday - well, i felt sick all morning, but decided that i need to do something. i turned on ondemand exercise tv and did a leg workout (hard as can be) and kendall's ab video (my favorite). something is better than nothing, i suppose.

this morning i woke up late - whoops. so i didn't head to the gym, but couldn't write off not exercising at all, so i used my handy ondemand again and did kendall's kick-butt cardio (my own name). it's real intense -- the same one that danielle and i have done (for my long-term readers. haha right.) i'll probably do some lunges and an ab workout after class, just to get in a 45 minute total workout today.

as for my diet, although i was quite relax this weekend, as of this morning - i'm back on my rigid schedule/rules. breakfast: yogurt & go lean crunch & lunch: delicious quesadilla. ohh how i love eating healthy. and after my 24-hour stomach ache, i'm keeping it this way. my body has spoken - there's no more day-long chow sessions allowed.

two weeks tomorrow.

tomorrow will mark two weeks of my new 2010 life. i feel about 100% healthier and more in shape. i'm not losing the number of pounds i want to be, but maybe the muscle i'm building is just evening it out? my arms are much more defined in just these few days and my running has become easier - so i'm going to need to push myself that much harder in the next few weeks.

thursday morning i did 35 minutes on the step-machine and then played tennis with becca for the first time in 2 or 3 months. that made me discover some new muscles. :] we're going to start playing everyday during the week though - so i'm excited about that. (plus an hour of extra cardio during the week!)

friday morning i was at my friend karen's house, so her and i did a cardio/dance workout video on ondemand (with kendall's annoying girls as back-up). it was hilarious and decent, probably wouldn't do it alone though. then we did kendall's abs video and i went harder than ever and felt like i was so close to pulling an ab. ouch - they have continued to experience that same pain/soreness since.

today i'm at my sister and brother-in-law's house, so to encourage and challenge my sister, her and i went running around the neighborhood. we ran just over 2 miles, and although a slow few miles - i felt incredible the whole time. makes me want to start training for that half marathon like i was going to. maybe i will - let's get through march first.

this is by far the longest i've gone on an independent workout schedule. so hopefully i keep it up and won't let down. i like my results so far and it has only been 13 days. i'm getting a little more relaxed on my dieting - so i need to tighten that back up and shoot for my march deadline. just keeping snacking to a minimum and looking for more natural options rather than popcorn (which i've been overloading on lately) and craving those sweets (more that i should).

tomorrow's sunday - so i'll probably take the day off unless i wake up early and go running. keep up your resolutions! let me know how you're doing. thanks for reading.

i'm a rule breaker.

i did it. i broke one of my rules. i'm not talking about eating 2,000 + 1 calorie. i mean the i'm-allowing-myself-to-break-a-rule-twice-a-month-style. tonight at work i ate a lot (i mean a LOT) of chocolate covered raisins. i tried not to. i opted out to get some other type of reward from my boss, but since i couldn't find the other reward, i settled for my weakness - those delicious little guys.

i tried to share with my co-workers so that i wouldn't devour the bag in just a few minutes. i probably ate about half of it by myself though (6 servings in a bag of 39 raisins). and now - well, i feel good because they were really delicious, but i also feel sick because i hadn't put that kind of garbage-y food into my body in about 2 weeks. the desserts that i have had so far have been less "fake". this was a low blow.

well there you have it - failure is my lifestyle. because i'm human. and that makes me so thankful for salvation and grace. not just in dieting, but life. i'll get over that mistake. next time - i'll save my dessert for the chocolate cake or a bowl of ice cream. :]

late night update.

it's 1am and i really don't want to be posting, but here i am - real quickly.

we went to workout again and i stair-stepped myself to another half hour segment. let me tell you - that machine is not easy (especially if you don't want it to be). i kill those calories like their mine to burn. jenna did the elliptical during - what a killer. what a pal. then we tried to jump-rope outside, but about 10 seconds into it, her rope completely snapped in half and some of it went flying. hilarious, but no good for the jump-roping.

later this evening i went back to the gym for some more cardio. i tried my hand at swimming, since i've never been good at it. i swam/treaded water for 20 minutes straight which was great. i would swim a lap (which kills me - don't laugh at me all you swimmers out there) then sit at the deep end, treading, for about 3-4 minutes and then another lap, then more treading. after 20 minutes, it's quite a workout. afterward my ankles were really sore since it was a different position for them to be pointed and have the water resistance against them, which is good because i need to get them strong for season. hopefully a little less injury this season.

well, off to read my Bible and then into bed. it's a late night thanks to a paper analyzing music and then a sad attempt to study for a quiz tomorrow. that will have to wait until the morning.

another semi-new year's resolution i've been working on for a little while is my sleeping habits. i want to try hard to go to bed before midnight, really 10:30 or 11 sounds ideal, so that i can get up in the morning at a reasonable time with strength and energy. once the real semester comes around i have 9am classes and i want to workout before that, so that means getting up at 7am or so each morning. no more 1am-ers or even later (God forbid) for me. good night. i'm outta here.

and i let it slide.

so since friday i guess? friday night i went to bed reading the bible and saturday i woke up and read. that felt great. since then i've been slacking until i go to bed to read. i have to start getting on that in the mornings. (which i enjoy so much more, but still have to remember for some reason.)

in recent news: the dieting is going GREAT. tracking my calorie intake is a lot better than guessing or guestimating (as my jr. high teachers would say). i've been around 1,400 - 1,800 calories everyday and still feel great. it also helps me stay aware of my sugars & sodium levels - which i seem to go over everyday, but i'm working on.

saturday's workout: half hour on the stairstepper. i did some major work that day. burned 400 calories and sweat off a few cups of goodness. shaner went with me and ran during - and since neither of us brought our ipods, we watched the strongest man competition on espn without sound in the weight room. gotta love those shows.

sunday the weight room is closed, so no workout. i don't mind. 6 out of 7 days is incredible for me.

monday (yesterday) i woke up and ran a little over 2 miles outside (it was beautifully snowing, yet really cold) for just over 20 minutes. then i went to the weight room and lifted for half an hour. after lunch, i came back to the apartment and jenna and i studied for our quiz in class. while she quizzed me i ran/jumped around in place for 10 more minutes of cardio. i'm going to count that day as a major success.

today i had to babysit in the morning, so i haven't worked out yet. as soon as jenna is done with her homework - we're out the door to get some major cardio in. :]

how is everyone else's progress?

too good to just let fly.

yesterday was too good of a day in my 2010 journey to just not mention. day 7 was memorable, and i hope i keep saying that in a week, month, few months. yesterday morning i got up and went and worked out on the stair stepper for a half hour, then came back to the room to finish up my workout using exercise tv on ondemand. then i took a shower and ate some delicious breakfast. (yogurt, clementine, cereal, and coffee - together about 200 calories)

then i took my coffee and decided to have coffee with Jesus. i mean - i have coffee with other friends, why not with my number one, right? so i read genesis 13-14 and psalm 7. then i read another chapter in becoming a woman of prayer and something hit me so hard. the chapter was about the Holy Spirit interceeding for us, but even more than that. the Father hears our prayers because of the Holy Spirit, we can't pray by ourselves. that's why romans 8:28 is so powerful and true, and completely relieving.

Romans 8:28: And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.

but even more than that,the author talks about how at the beginning of each year, she asks the Spirit to lead her to a passage for that year, to open her heart to a new yearly lesson. she told stories about how each passage she was lead to was exactly what she prayed for herself to learn (humility, letting go of sinful tangles, etc.). immediately i knew that the Spirit had been working in me, i had half heard, and had not known how to respond.

after reading crazy love i was really challenged about big steps in my life that i needed to make, but i was a little hesitant because i didn't know how others would accept my changes or decisions or just the difference within me. i didn't know if people would understand why i would be so different or how i fell upon these "radical" decisions. i knew that these fears or uncertainties shouldn't stop me from answering the clal of God on my life, but i didn't know how to get around them. then last sunday, the message was set in luke 2 - the story of Christ's childhood. the speaker asked us to really ask God to point out to us the reason we were reading that particular portion of scripture that day - to see what God wanted each of us specifically to get out of it. well the first time through the passage, i almost lost it. here it is:

Luke 2:48-50, 52 "His parents didn’t know what to think. 'Son,' his mother said to him, 'why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been frantic, searching for you everywhere.' 'But why did you need to search?' he asked. 'Didn’t you know that I must be in my Father’s house?' But they didn’t understand what he meant... Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and all the people."

these verses explain perfectly the dilemma that i thought i was dealing with - people not understanding what i would be doing or my motive behind it. Christ wasn't worried about if people (his own parents even) approved of his current location or activity - he was too worried about doing his Father's work. i want to be too worried, too consumed about doing my Father's work. this is my prayer for this year. that i would be too captivated by my Daddy to worry about others' opinions of my actions or radical christianity, that i would be so wrapped up with His will that i didn't look for approval in other areas of life. i don't expect to succeed everyday, but i want to focus harder, to look straighter, and to really seek out living radically for the Kingdom.

so if you didn't get any of that - it's okay. i guess this blog is for me too... for me to look back and remember by purpose and to rely back on days that i was excited about the year when i want to quit or throw the towel in. but if you did get it - i challenge you to it. (pick up crazy love and you will not be the same... well, you actually have to read it first.)

physically yesterday was a great day too, although after writing all that and remediating on the fact that God was working in my life yesterday, my well-excersized day looks like nothing in comparison. wednesday night lori came over. her, jenna, and i worked out on exercise tv for an hour. we did a half hour of cardioke (pretty fun workout i must admit), then a leg workout (killer), and an abs video (with kendall - killer). it was really fun to workout with them - so hopefully that will be come a weekly ritual.

kelsey came over last night (shane's sister) and she came with good news: (well first of all - she brought me a self magazine - my latest craving and obsession.) there's a site sponsored by livestrong that is called: my plate. it counts your calories for you (much more effective and useful than mypyramid.gov) and gives you a calorie allowance for whatever your weight loss/maintaining goal is. for instance, currently my goal is to lose one pound per week: i put in my height and weight and currently lifestyle (active) - it tells me how many calories i can consume. then i tell it what workout i did and it gives me how many more i can have during the day. really effective tool for anyone that wants to just see how they are doing to get an idea of what the possibilities are.

this morning, kels and i went and worked out in the gym for a while. i did 15 minutes on the elliptical and 20 minutes of weight lifting (arms, shoulders, chest, back, legs). after being sore yesterday, i felt really good today. i'm loving that i still have a positive attitude about this whole new lifestyle - i know it's only 8 days in, but this is probably 8 days longer than i have ever lasted before.

thanks for reading and listening to my ranting. thank you for letting me know that you're trying out 2010 as well. here's a shout-out to all my fellow crazy people that think this is the year for change: ashley, danielle, michelle, tiffany (& uncle randy, i think), aunt debbie, erin, & kelsey. anyone else need support or encouragement? let me know. i love knowing there's other people going through this. for those of you who get up in the morning and just want to sleep in rather than workout - call me and i can see if i can't convince you. if you want to be that person for me - let me know. i'm going to need someone soon. :]

hello january 6th.

this morning was GREAT. currently (and i stress currently because i'm sure this feeling is temporary) i love working out. this morning i woke up at 9, went running outside for 10 minutes then biked on the spinning bike for 20 minutes. then i worked out my arms, chest, back, shoulders, and legs. it felt wonderful.

unfortunately in the 6 days of 2010, i've already developed an addiction to coffee. i thought i would be fine coming back to school, getting away from my parents' extremely nice instant coffee maker, but i was wrong. i came back to school and my roommate quri decided to buy a coffee maker this past weekend. we just had to test it out today, and let me tell you - it was fantastic. this is no good.

i haven't read my B-i-b-l-e yet today, but sooner than not shaner and i will sit down and read it.

last night before bed i was reading becoming a woman of prayer and studied parts of jeremiah and other books, concentrating on our approach to prayer. we often view prayer as our coming to God and presenting our praise and requests, but the author talked about God wanting us in His presence, inviting us into prayer with Him.

i finished the chapter with a concentration of jeremiah 33:3 "call to me and i will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." i had left my Bible open so that i could highlight the verse this morning and when i got my breakfast around and about to highlight it, i spilled my cup of milk on it. i had to un-stick all the pages, and i just feel so sad about my Bible.

i've felt so lazy all day, spending my afternoon since class watching 3 discs of friends. working out in the morning makes me feel wonderful, but sitting around all afternoon makes me feel useless and like the workout in the morning didn't work. i'm going to have to make my days more productive... wish i had more hours at work. well, in a few minutes my friend lori is coming over to do a cardio dance workout video from ondemand with my roommate jenna and i, looking forward to it! :]

day 5 - which is 1% completion of the 365 days in 2010.

this morning i needed a friend, some accountability and encouragement. i am so grateful to danielle for being here this morning. i tried to convince her we didn't need to work out since i had ran on sunday and that's not in my plan. she tried to reason with me, and after much debate we decided to just get going: running and ondemand workout.

we went 1.5 mile down to the nearby elementary school and back. i had forgotten that school was back in session, so as we rounded about the school, kindergartners were out to recess. they responded to us as if they had never seen a dog in their lives. once girl kept yelling "DOG, DOG, HEY LOOK - THERE'S A DOG, DOG!" she chased the three of us (biz, the said dog, and myself) almost off the school property. what a cook.

when we returned back from our run we started the cardio workout video on ondemand. it was really challenging - especially after a 15 minute run. 30 minute video and a 15 minute run got a well-earned 45 minutes of cardio in today. then we did some partner stretching to work on flexibility.

i'm really looking forward to biking or doing the elliptical when i get back to school in the workout room. although - the new tvs in the workout room at school are set to news channels with corresponding radio stations to tune your dial into to listen. since i don't have a walkman (which i think it has been at least 10 years since i carried around) and the ipod touch doesn't offer a fm radio dial application, those are no good. i hate reading the subtitles. hopefully i can find some more books on tape so that my workouts are still enjoyable.

we ate some delicious lunch - egg sandwich and salad. felt so good to eat well after a good workout. tonight shane and i are going out for our 2 year to olive garden, but i still have 1,000 calories to "spend" on my meal tonight - so alfredo is possible. praise the Lord. :]

after danielle left, shane and i sat down to read genesis 9-10 and psalm 5. although there were a ton of names that i had never heard of before (all the descendants of noah), i tried to give them value and pronounce them best i could rather then just skipping over. i figure that i shouldn't belittle any part of the Bible as i read it - God obviously has purpose for each word, so i'm trying to respect even the seemingly boring or easy to look over parts.

this afternoon i'm going to start reading becoming a woman of prayer, a 50-page or so book that was a mother's day present leftover from church a few years ago. this past week i cleaned out quite a few books from my collection and donated some of the christian books to church's library and the others to willard library (our local public), but i had come across this book and decided to add it to my list for the year. yesterday i also picked up mere christianity by c.s. lewis at the library, which i look forward to getting into.

tomorrow's my first day officially on the workout plan (minus the hour of tennis until practice starts back up). i will finally have access to weights in the workout room and i can use the elliptical or bike to replace my hour of tennis with a 30 minute segment. i'm eager for my roommate beth to get back on campus (she doesn't come back until the end of january) because she will be helpful accountability and workout partner, but until then it's really up to me to prove to myself how serious i am about this and how badly i want it. i'd love the encouragement and help - please offer if you have any.